nose
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Picking Your Nose  do we all do it? 
                                                      
Now I'm sure that we all know how one goes about
                                                      picking their nose, so we can skip the step-by-step
                                                      instructions.  
                                                      We've all caught someone at sometime picking their
                                                      nose.  Some try to do it in secret.  Others do it openly
                                                      without embarrassment.  Maybe even you have been
                                                      caught in the act.  
                                                      Nose-picking is one disgusting habit and is certainly not
                                                      socially acceptable.  So, are these people normal?  
                                                      One would guess that this is not the type of thing
                                                      researched at our institutions of higher learning.  
                                                      Guess again.  
                                                      Believe it or not, there was a study on nose-picking
                                                      published in February of 1995 in the Journal of
                                                      Psychiatry.  Yes, you read it right  college professors
                                                      being paid the big bucks to find out who picks their
                                                      nose.  
                                                      Of course, scientists must give everyday things
                                                      complicated scientific names.  Nose-picking is a term
                                                      for us common folk.  Nose-picking should really be
                                                      referred to as rhinotillexomania (rhino=nose,
                                                      tillexis=habit of picking at something, mania=obsession
                                                      with something).  So, the next time that you see a
                                                      person picking their nose, tell them that they are a
                                                      rhinotillexomaniac.  
                                                      The researchers prepared their "Rhinotillexomania
                                                      Questionnaire" and randomly mailed it to 1000
                                                      residents in Dane County, Wisconsin.  Each survey
                                                      included a cover letter that stated "The University of
                                                      Wisconsin is conducting a survey of a common but
                                                      understudied habit scientifically known as
                                                      'rhinotillexomania'.  Its common name is nose-picking."  
                                                      Even better, the letter actually defined what
                                                      nose-picking is: "Insertion of a finger (or other object)
                                                      into the nose with the intention of removing dried nasal
                                                      secretions."  I'll bet that you already knew that.  
                                                      Can you imagine getting this survey in the mail?  Even
                                                      with the University's seal on the stationary, one would
                                                      have to wonder whether this was a joke or not.  
                                                      Now for the results (assuming that they are reliable):  
                                                      Of the 1000 surveys mailed out, only 254 were
                                                      completed and returned to the researchers. 
                                                           8.7% claim that they have never picked their
                                                           nose.  (In other words, they are liars or they can't
                                                           remember doing it as a kid.) 
                                                           91% stated that they had picked their nose in the
                                                           past and were still actively practicing this habit. 
                                                           Yet, only 49.2% of the respondents actually
                                                           thought that nose-picking was common in adults. 
                                                           9.2% rate their pickin' as »more than average.« 
                                                           25.6% actually pick their noses daily, 22.3% do
                                                           it 2 to 5 times each day, and three people
                                                           admitted to doing it at least hourly. 
                                                           55.5% spent 1-5 minutes, 23.5% spent 5-15
                                                           minutes, and 0.8% (2 people) spent 15-30
                                                           minutes each day cleaning their nostrils.  One
                                                           lone soul claims to devote over 2 hours each day
                                                           to this ritual (I'm not a doctor and I can tell you
                                                           that this guy definitely has rhinotillexomania).  
                                                           18% reported nosebleeds, while 0.8% claimed
                                                           perforation of the nasal septum from their
                                                           nose-picking. 
                                                           82.8% had picked their noses to "unclog the
                                                           nasal passages", 66.4% had done it to relieve
                                                           discomfort or itchiness, 35.7% to avoid the
                                                           unsightly appearance of a booger hanging from
                                                           their nose, 34.0% for personal hygiene, and
                                                           17.2% picked out of habit.  2.1% (five people)
                                                           claimed to pick solely for enjoyment.  To no
                                                           one's surprise, one perverted person picked
                                                           his/her nose for »sexual stimulation.« 
                                                           65.1% use their index finger, 20.2% use their
                                                           pinky, and 16.4% use their thumb (must have
                                                           BIG nostrils to fit a thumb in) as their instrument
                                                           of choice. 
                                                           Most people (90.3%) disposed of the goop in a
                                                           tissue or a handkerchief, while 28.6% used the
                                                           floor, and 7.6% stuck it to the furniture.  
                                                           8% of the respondents actually ate the end
                                                           product.  In case you are thinking of trying this
                                                           delicacy, the study claims that the pickings are
                                                           quite tasty (salty). 
                                                      So, what have we learned from this groundbreaking
                                                      study?  
                                                      First, we now have positive proof that picking one's
                                                      nose is almost a universally practiced custom, although
                                                      most won't admit to it.  
                                                      Second, boogers apparently taste good, although I can
                                                      guarantee to you that I will never do the taste testing to
                                                      find out.  
                                                      And, lastly, when researchers are devoting money and
                                                      time to studying the picking habits of the United States,
                                                      it comes as no surprise that we can't find a cure for
                                                      cancer or HIV.